<a href="http://blessedwidow.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/02/Superbowl-Sunday-with-words.jpg"><img class="alignnone size-medium wp-image-98" src="http://blessedwidow.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/02/Superbowl-Sunday-with-words-300×200.jpg" alt="Superbowl Sunday with words" width="300" height="200" /></a>
Everyone loves football, right? Well, the answer is no. I have never really been a football fan. I know that when my son plays football, I will enoy watching him play. Other than that, I don’t really care for football. Willy loved football, but was never into watching every Sunday, or Monday night. But one thing he did enjoy, was Super Bowl Sunday.
When Willy and I got married, I learned about the wonderful Super Bowl Sunday party. It was the one day a year that I would sit by his side, and watch the game. I did it because it was something he enjoyed, and I loved to be with him. I have many fond memories of this day.
This year, our Pastor invited everyone to their house for a bbq, pool party. They would have the game on inside the house for those that wanted to watch it. And for those of us who didn’t, we could hang out at the pool. This was a perfect plan. My kids could watch the game if they wanted, and I could enjoy a relaxing afternoon with friends.
Game day arrived, and the festivities began. I refused to go inside to watch the game and many people asked me why I didn’t want to watch. I smiled, and politely said "I don’t care for football." This went on throughout the day. When others would start talking about the score, or the game, I would walk away. They teased me and made a joke of it. I know that no one could really undestand the truth of what was in my mind and heart.
Widows do not think like others. We think a lot with our hearts and not logically with our minds. I could not watch the game, because Willy is not here to watch it with me. Does this make sense? No, not really. Now, this logic doesn’t work when it comes to watching our children play sports, but it can work for me for the Super Bowl.
Now, when others asked me why I didn’t want to watch the game, I took the polite way out because if I told them the truth, it would make them uncomfortable. It would go something like this:
<p style="text-align: justify;">Bob: "Why don’t you want to watch the game?"</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Me: "Because I never liked to watch the Super Bowl until I met Willy. Then every year we would watch it together. It was a special day for us to spend time together doing something Willy enjoyed. So, since Willy is not here, I would rather poke my eyes out with a hot fireplace pokers then watch the game without him."</p>
<p style="text-align: justify;">Bob: "Oh….uh….ok. Can you pass the salsa?"</p>
So, next time your widow friend does something that is not logical to you, remember, her logic is different from yours. If you question her as to why she does something, know that her answer is probably a polite excuse so you don’t have to hear the truth. If you are a close friend, and you can see that deception in her eye and you are really ready to listen to the truth, ask her to share the truth and pain. But I warn you, don’t ask if you are not ready to really listen, and willing to watch her cry through it. Don’t try to fix it, just listen and cry with her.